I almost got into a fight on Thursday night. Aaron and I went to Mongolian Barbecue in Royal Oak, and I got my first bowl while he was eating salad. When I got out to the patio where we were seated, he went in to get in line. A couple minutes later I see the hostess talking to a couple who were trying to get seating for four on the patio, and the only table was right next to me, and it was only a 3-person table. They were being insistent about it, and I immediately got irritated because I was sure they were going to all squeeze into it and get me crammed in the corner.
Well sure enough, out they come, and it’s three adults and a little girl, so it really wasn’t that bad. However, I was already edgy about having my space invaded and when the woman yanked her chair back, it slammed into my elbow. I immediately shoved it back toward her with said elbow and growled, “Could you please not hit me with the chair?”
I think she started to apologize but before she could her husband, who hadn’t sat down yet, started his mouth.
“Why you gotta shove the chair like that?! You treat her with respect, she’s a lady!” I tried to explain but he kept yapping right over top of me and, not having a very strong voice at the best of times, I couldn’t get a word in edgewise. After about three seconds of this crap my Fight-or-Flight mode kicked in, the needle swung all the way over to Fight, and I stood up. The manager got between us, and the guy and I tried to out yell each other for a few more seconds. I finally got across that she had hit me with the chair when she pulled it out, I asked her not too, and that was the end of it. He finally shut up, but I couldn’t resist a parting shot: “And you can turn down the macho, too.” He didn’t have a response for that one.
So everyone has more or less settled down at this point, and the waitress is behind the manager looking at me with wide eyes and mouthing, “I’m so sorry” at me. I’ve apologized to the woman again, nicer this time, and she’s apologized to me, and now I’m taking deep breaths to calm down. There’s so much adrenalin in my system I’ve got the shakes, and I still wouldn’t mind taking a crack at the husband. Normally when faced with the prospect of a fight I’m at least a little afraid of what’s going to happen, but not this time. No fear and no hesitation. Bring it ON, muthafucka! 😀
Aaron finally saunters out of the restaurant, sits down and, thinking I’ve been out there boy-watching, asks, “So, did you have plenty to keep you occupied while I was gone?”
I busted out laughing.
“You could say that.”
I know full well that the entire situation was ultimately my fault, because I overreacted to something that turned out to be nothing. If I hadn’t got my panties in a bunch over the possibility I’d get crowded into the corner then I wouldn’t have gone off when she hit me with the chair. Somehow, though, I ended up looking like the good guy because I defused the situation by explaining what happened instead of hitting the guy. The manager apologized to me repeatedly and even comped us the price of a desert. Apparently they had been a pain in the ass from the moment they walked in, and continued to be after our little episode. So I don’t feel bad about it, and a small part of me is actually sorry I didn’t get to fight him.
So much for civilization…